The two lane road stretched out endlessly
Crisscrossing the expansive, rolling plains
Sometimes stern and utterly straight
Other times slithering like a large serpent
Turning, looping, rising, and falling,
Colliding abruptly into each horizon.
A single car travelled the road day after day
Shifting direction from one to the next
This day moving decisively in one direction
The next returning back the way they came
Others days looping - forward/back, forward/back
A chaotic cycle embedded in deep confusion
One way lead forward from present to future
Full of new experiences and endless possibilities .
The other led backward, rehashing the past
Memories carelessly scattered each side of the road
A few bright, bringing a smile and warmth,
Others unwelcome, both dark and disturbing
Lured back by trauma’s powerful siren’s call
Caught in a harsh snare of darkest regrets
Reliving, repeating, regretting and deep loss
Harsh experiences and emotional wars arise
A dark and heavy burden loaded on in layers
Grief rose for a storybook past that never was.
One day the car stropped dead in its tracks
Idling in the present, a decision was made
Finally finished with u-turns and grieving.
A commitment was made to accept life as it is.
Moving slowly at first, then increasing its speed
Toward the promise of a future, soft and serene.
What happened, what didn't happen stays in the past.
Unchangeable, the only choice to simply let go.
Forgive what did happen, and grieve what did not
Every experience, every decision, both bright and dark
Are woven intimately into who we have become
As it was, as it is - are the heartbeats of our soul.
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