Accept The Pivot

AHHH the pivot!  You know what I am talking about.  You have your plans in place.  You are working towards your goals and dreams. You are sure what you future will hold.  Then it happens. A door slams shut and there you are standing frozen trying to figure out what happened. 

My first major life pivot was away from the career I knew I would follow from my early teens.  I struggled growing up, not really fitting into the religious environment I was immersed in or my parents' expectations - neither religiously or as a female.  Guided by their religious focus and the time I was born, the box for females was restrictive. 

I was a feminist from my earliest memories. I just didn't know what being a feminist meant. And I struggled with religion in general which added to my confusion.  Never one who could fake it or pretend, my differences stood out strongly even though I didn't act out publicly. I didn't want to embarrass my parents, so just quietly held my own in my thoughts and my beliefs.  Those I would not budge no matter how much pleading and condemnation rained down on me. 

My struggles, paired with a very strong emotional radar that picked up the suffering of others led me to believe the perfect career for me was to become a Psychologist.  My teenage brain painted a lovely image of what my future would be.  Broken people would come to me, I hear their sorrows and pain, help them find a solution, and then send them on their way healthy, happy and ready to live a fabulous life.  I know. I know. I was book smart, and struggled myself daily, but still didn't understand the sheer complexity of  human suffering. 

About a third of the way through earning my MA in Psychology and Drug Abuse, reality came calling and it all fell apart.  A professor I held great respect for who was also also had a Psychiatric practice decided to share about his last year.  He had 2 clients not only try, but successfully commit suicide.  He had a father who was having sexual feeling for his teenage daughter, but not acting on it.  And he shared at that time that Marriage and Family Counselling was showing only a 5% success rate at that time. By the time people decided to get help, it was too late.  

Stunned, I suddenly realized I didn't have the strength to carry that kind of heavy emotional load.  I wasn't the kind of person who could leave things at the office. What people shared with me landed hard on my shoulders. I couldn't put that down until they were better.  Listening to people's suffering day after day combined with the low of a success rate wasn't a good choice for my future. I walked away lost and confused. It wasn't until several decades later I found my passion - interviewing and writing. 

I have known many others who faced pivots for many reasons.  Health issues, accidents, family responsibilities, cutbacks at work, aging, divorce, and more.  These pushes to pivot are hard to handle as they often come without warning.  There are also easier way to discover the need to change directions.  You might wake up one day, or realize over a period of time, that your current direction no longer satisfies you. You might hear the siren call to embrace a new direction you are passionate about.  Or an opportunity you had never consider falls in your lap, one you instantly know is right.  That last was my experience.  Craigslist proved to be my fairy godmother. 

It has been predicted that work pivots are going to become the norm, that young people now will now most likely have 3 or 4 different careers over their lifetime. That is an enormous change from what I grew up with. How will they cope?  From what I have been reading, the best place to start is to simply accept the pivot.  To get caught up in the "why's" or why "me's," to dwell on what was lost, is to be held back living in past memories.  

Accepting the pivot frees you mind, and your innate intuition, to the opportunities around you.  It let's you open up to a different future, perhaps one you never even imagined. Let go of all expectations of what you think you want or should look for, and open up to a future of possibilities.  Trust your instincts and try to not let fear hold you back from heading in a new and exciting direction.